Thoughts Some People Have Towards Breastfeeding

So since becoming a new mom, I never thought I would face such impractical and ignorant ideas when it comes to nursing. It’s 2014 and you’d think by now, breastfeeding would have a whole new view, but, nope. Not even close.

Disclaimer- I’d also like to say that before you read this, understand it’s not meant to be snarky because some people truly don’t understand how annoying and hurtful some of these comments can be to a nursing mom. Bottom line is that I never force breastfeeding down people’s throats which is why it drives me insane to have others try to force their OPINION on breastfeeding down my throat. I do what works for me, my child, and family. I am always discreet and never make others feel uncomfortable. If there are children around, I cover as best I can because I know many people just don’t want to explain it to their kids (even though breastfeeding is perfectly NORMAL). I also have several friends who cannot breastfeed and they want nothing more than to continue breastfeeding. To me, when people make ignorant comments, I find that it is more hurtful because it is such a special thing for each mama. So as you read this, whether you agree or not, think about the things I’ve mentioned the next time you choose to bash (knowingly or unknowingly) a nursing mama!

My pet peeves when it comes to people bashing breastfeeding in general and breastfeeding in public…..these seem to be the most common thoughts of people who don’t support it and my thoughts towards these ideas…

Thought: I breastfeed in public so the entire world can see my boobs
Reality: Uh no…a complete stranger is the LAST person I want to see any part of my boob. I also wouldn’t want most people I KNOW to see my boobs.

Thought: Why can’t you just use a cover or something?
Reality: My child is a complete nightmare when I use a cover (pulling it off, yanking at it, exposing me way more than without using it, 10x more distracted, becoming even grouchier because she’s roasting under a cover). Sorry, I won’t compromise my child’s comfort because you can’t look the other way. If your kid cooperates with a cover, yay for you!

Thought: Ew. Nursing in public is so gross. I don’t want to see that!
Reality: If you’re so offended and “grossed out”, why the hell are you watching!? I’m FEEDING my child, do ya mind?! If you’re so bothered by it, cover yourself or look away.

Thought: I am a TOTAL supporter of breastfeeding but….
Reality: You are NOT a total supporter of breastfeeding if you have any “buts” in your sentence. You’re what the breastfeeding world calls a “butter”. If you are a TOTAL supporter, you support every mother in the way that works best for her and her family- not what makes YOU comfortable.

Thought: Can’t you just pump and bring a bottle????
Reality: Seriously? Being a mom is already hectic enough. Why would I want to lug a bottle around, make sure the milk is being kept cold enough, then when baby is ready to eat (which isn’t like “oh hey mama, I’m gonna be hungry in precisely 13.23 minutes….”, It’s more like: “dammit woman, give me a boob now! I am famished and cannot wait 2 more seconds before screaming my head off because I will obviously die if I have to wait 1 minute longer”) trying to find a place to warm up said milk, etc. Why do this when I can give her a boob with as much milk as she needs at the perfect temperature!? Also, not all women can pump adequate amounts of milk or pump at all.

Thought: Go into the bathroom, it’s way more private!
Reality: No thanks…that’s gross. If I want privacy, I’ll find it, but it sure as hell won’t be in a public bathroom. Thanks for trying to seem like you’re being compassionate about it when you’re really trying to shove me into the bathroom because YOU feel uncomfortable. I don’t eat my food in a bathroom, you don’t eat your food in a bathroom, and my child does not eat her food in the bathroom- boob or otherwise.

Thought: Ugh, that is indecent exposure! If a man can’t whip it out and urinate in public without being arrested, why should you be able to breastfeed?
Reality: Are you ^%$^@! kidding me? Urinating and feeding a child are on completely different levels. Don’t sound like such an uneducated idiot. Can you nourish a child with urine? No. End of story.

Thought: That is a private but still totally natural thing- just do it in the privacy of your home like other “natural, private things”!
Reality: Again, are you ^$@##! joking? Completely different situations, again. I’m feeding a baby, not trying to make you watch me make another. kthanks.

Thought: Feed your baby before leaving the house, do your errands super quick, then go home to feed them again! Plan ahead! It’s simple!!
Reality: Holy shit, did you seriously just solve every mom’s “having to run errands but still needing to nurse her child” dilemma?! Hot damn, you deserve an award for your brilliant idea!! Oh wait…nope you’re still an idiot. No young child eats on a schedule and nowadays, we are encouraged to “feed on demand” aka “how every grown person eats- when they’re hungry”! Sorry, but, my child has no schedule to eat. Sometimes she eats and then wants to eat again in an hour, sometimes it will be 3 hours between feedings. If I have a whole 2+ hours worth of errands, I’m gonna feed my child if she’s hungry whether I’m home or getting groceries! Believe it or not, I still want to aimlessly wander around Target for longer than necessary even though I now have a nursing child versus when I was a childless being! I’m not going to stay cooped up in my house because nursing my babe is obviously distracting you from enjoying the mindless money-sucking vortex delight known more commonly as Target.

Thought: I don’t want my kids seeing that!!! (or the other thoughts of “I don’t want my teenage sons seeing that!” or “I don’t want my husband seeing that”)
Reality: I’m sorry you feel uncomfortable telling your children, especially your sons who will most likely become fathers one day, what breasts are truly there for. I hope your sons become educated enough to support their future partners if they decide to breastfeed their future children. I also hope your daughters learn that their breasts are not only there for sexual purposes and that their primary use and reason for existing is to nourish their children. And I will pray for you when you have to have the sex talk with your kids because if you can’t handle a little breastfeeding explanation, I’d hate to see how you deal with “The Talk” and all the questions that will result. Yikes!

Whew. Ok. I feel better now.  But in all seriousness, be part of the movement that wants to‪‎ support nursing mamas and normalize breastfeeding– not the part that tears us down and makes us feel bad for choosing the best we can for our babes! Support mamas and what works for THEM- end of of story.

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The dreaded “T” word…

The Dreaded T Word

TEETHING.

SomeEcards- Teething

I think it is the most despised, feared, and exhausting part of raising a kiddo. Did I mention despised? I did? Well I will say it again- DESPISED.

You know, starting out after labor and delivery, I was CONVINCED I was going to die of exhaustion with this new, tiny, adorable, and needy little human screaming at me every few minutes (okay…every couple hours) until I pulled a boob out. I was CONVINCED I would die of starvation because I was constantly feeding the new, tiny, adorable, and needy little human while rarely finding a grape or peanut for myself. I was CONVINCED I would die of being smelly because I felt like I never got a free second to shower.

Looking back, those days were a piece of cake. Delicious, yummy, cake.

Fast forward to about 4 months old…early teething sets in. Okay, we can handle this. We have PLENTY of things for this not-so-new, still tiny, even more adorable, and still needy little human to chew on. My finger? Sure! The dog’s rubber ball? Sure! (Oh wait..that wasn’t the best choice you say? Give me your address and I’ll send this little human to your house!) My toe? Um…sure…wait, no..this is weird…stop little human!

Fast forward to 8 months…STILL NO TEETH! What the heck!? Is this a joke? Is our kid normal? Are there even teeth in there!?!?! It seriously had to be a joke when the pediatrician said some babies don’t get a tooth until 12 months or more…so NOT funny. I’m running out of things for this not-new-anymore, much bigger, still super adorable, but SO GROUCHY little human to chew on. I swear these teeth will just pop up in the next day or so….they have to. All I can say is THANK YOU for teething necklaces and teething toys.

Fast forward to now…10.5 months. FINALLY the 1st tooth has appeared and punctured those tiny little gums. Now, this one tiny little tooth…was the cause of so much misery in this household that I seriously thought we had fallen to the depths of hell and we would never find our way back to earth. Yes, it WAS that bad. And side note, this was all while using a Baltic amber necklace…I have had nightmares about if we hadn’t ordered it…terrifying.

We are now working on pushing that second, tiny, demonic white thing through the gummy surface of our 10.5 month old girl’s mouth. Have I mentioned how much I have PRAYED for teeth? Yes, I pray for teeth- that makes me sound insane, I hear it now…no need to mention it…

If our girl wasn’t so cute when she isn’t screaming, throwing her entire body back in a temper, throwing toys, gnawing her toys down to nubs, or refusing to sleep for any length of time…I may have sent her to Shawnee Acres already (this isn’t a real place- I promise…it is a long told story in my family about good girls and boys who are naughty…they get sent to live at Shawnee Acres!)

So fellow parents, know you are not alone in this fight with tiny teeth. One day, we will come out victorious….once all the teeth come in. Until then, call me for a margarita date…I need it and you probably do too. :)

What we’re all about.

What We're All About

Simplify. Simplify our day. Simplify our schedules. Simplify our lives.

Isn’t that what we all WANT to do but never ACTUALLY do?

It seems so easy to simplify our everyday lives- get rid of things we don’t use or need, cancel cable (because in reality, you probably only watch a handful of channels), get rid of those smartphones and downgrade to an old school flip phone (or, GASP, no cell phone at all), quit going out to eat and cook healthy meals at home, eat healthier by growing your own veggies and fruits. It SEEMS so easy, but, truthfully the majority of us have major trouble even considering one of the things mentioned above.

Simplifying our life and becoming more self-reliant is exactly what my family is hoping to do over the next few years. Granted, we’re still keeping our cable and smartphones for the time-being, we’re still WAY guilty of going out to eat more than we should, and we struggle enough with remembering to water our grass let alone trying to plant and keep veggies alive! Like I said, it SEEMS easy but then everyday life scoots on in and becomes the annoying house guest that doesn’t want to leave. EVER.

Now that my husband and I are parents, we’re truly seeing the value of becoming more self-reliant in many aspects.

My husband has been interested in homesteading and self-reliance for awhile now and I usually just smiled and nodded at him when he brought up the crazy idea of owning chickens, making our own stuff, and growing the majority of our food. I admit I was not fond of the chicken idea at ALL (they always seem so loud, dirty, and well…just annoying). Plus, I can barely find time to shower and brush my teeth most days with a teething baby who refuses to sit still and wants to be held CONSTANTLY, let alone take care of more living and breathing creatures. But, I have come around as I have seen how downhill our society and country has gone in the last couple years. I want to know how and be able to do as many things on our own as possible. Now, don’t get the crazy idea that we’re “preppers” in the reality TV sense. We’re far from that, however, we want to become more self-reliant in case we ever truly need to depend on ourselves and a small community for whatever reason. Plus, we’re excited to start making more of our own, HEALTHY, natural food!

We’re what I call “semi-crunchy” parents. I breastfeed and don’t plan on stopping until my little one chooses to wean on her own. We bed-share, baby-wear, and we stumble along with baby led feeding (or weaning if you please). I make 99% of our girl’s food. We believe in gentle attachment parenting, not letting our girl cry it out, and we’re seriously considering homeschooling when the time comes.

We want our girl (and possibly future kiddos) to grow up and know what she can achieve on her own in this crazy world. We want her to have a sense of responsibility and a choice for the life and things she can create. We don’t want her to become dependent on others for the bare life necessities like food, shelter, and everyday items. I know that my husband and I have become dependent on too many things created by others that we could easily make ourselves!

Over the next few months and years, we’re hoping to begin growing our own veggies and fruits again, get some chickens so we can have fresh, organic, PURE eggs, and learn how to make things we regularly use on our own!

It will definitely be an adventure and I hope you will enjoy following us as we embark on our (slow and steady) suburban homesteading journey!